“You’ll want to stay home anyway and we have to let go of one person”.
In her own words –
“That is what my former employer told me, while I was pregnant. I was shocked & devastated.
All my life, I dreamed of having a family, but I was also fully committed to my work.
Getting laid off while pregnant, took a decision away from me. Yet, I craved having a purpose, interaction with other adults. I wanted to have impact on something outside my family. I noticed as my kids grew, my desire to be a great mom started to crumble. I was too invested, too focused on them instead of myself. Where was I? What did I want to do? I didn’t even know.
I was lucky enough to know I needed a coach to exercise mindfulness so that I could figure out what I wanted for every aspect of my life. I learned that control, anxiety, fear and being overwhelmed are not healthy ways to live. I now first serve myself so that I can be whole to work productively and be an available parent. I lay boundaries for both roles so that I am at my best. My career is something that I value and it brings me a sense purpose and accomplishment. My children are my life, my joys, my loves. I have much better relationships with them because they are on their own path. I can help them to discover it, as their witness, not on their back.
I’m passionate about other people learning the same and have developed techniques for employees. I have assembled a team who help me coach working parents. When children are raised with available, loving, mindful parents they grow into compassionate adults who know themselves. Women need to be in the workplace because they add value and brilliance in solving world problems. Men need to be part of family formula so there is equity in the emotional labor women take on, otherwise women won’t have the bandwidth to work effectively.
Our clients are overwhelmed and anxious about raising their children and managing their careers. We help them to learn what they want and start with mindfulness. We coach people who want to have a great family and at the same time, have passion and talents that should be used in their career. We need a new way of obtaining the great advantages of our modern workplace. It’s not more time with our families, it’s intense time and devoted time to really connect. One way is to get very clear with our own desires and how we divide our time.
Coaching working parents who struggle with knowing what is important is key. When they are clear about themselves and their needs, they prioritize better and work more productively. They know who they are, what they want, what their goals are and if their actions are matching them. Employers try to put processes and mechanistic standards in place to help their employees. Working parents don’t want fancy drinks and ping pong tables. Those are only bonuses and aren’t real indicators of success or failure. Busy parents are caught on the tread mill of doing and accomplishing, checking off their lists. This causes a significant rise in anxiety, depression and death by suicide. The performative culture has to change and our coaching techniques get straight to the heart of how to do it.”
Participants in this project will be supporting the efforts of Dress for Success Worldwide – Central. We are all stronger together and it is my sincere hope that we will be inspired by each other’s stories. Now is the time to celebrate as well as encourage one another. Tell your story!***